Jerry, you need to find god
i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
Its as if he has to do the exact opposite of what I tell him. Don't come in my eye, pfshh it's in my eye. Don't come on the cat, pfshh it's on the cat.
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
FUCK and YOU. times 10. To infinity and beyond. You bastard. Worst. Cockblock. Ever. I'm going to nail your sister.
Pretty sure we're going to get a cease & desist notice from the Make A Wish Foundation, but until then...
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
Randomize
