i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
onenightstand. Woke up and saw my nuva ring on the floor. apparently he thought it was a glow stick. pick me up please?
he didnt ask why there was a glowstick shoved up your vag?
You totally narrated your dogs thoughts for 2 and a half hours last night, and I was enthralled. I didn't say one word, I just listened.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ran into that hot funeral director in the bar two days after the wake. pretty sure we drunk made out.
Grandpa would have been proud
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
Unless you can blow me and bake me a pie at the same time, im not impressed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
At least Shia Labeouf would encourage me to do this drinking contest
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
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