I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
Hurry up. Some creepy guy with a "God is vengeful" flyer is asking where I wanna go most today. I think he's going to chop me into pieces.
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
I fell off my bed and busted open my chin on the prisoner of azkaban. Somehow missed the almost empty Jose handle next to it. So guess what I was doing last night?
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
I found your missing hash cookies. Fuck you and I'm sorry but there are only 2 left. I already had the munchies.
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
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