If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
Woke up with an epic boner today, the kind where you can spin books and shit on it. FYI: don't try spinning an encyclopedia
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
Listen, some people have dreams, some people just want to cock slap a kangaroo
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
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