I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
toilet paper cling ons are not as adorable as the little red cub makes them look on the charmin commercials.
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.
how did my horoscope know i was too hungover to operate a stove.
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
I also tried to solve my dog's itching problem with crystal healing. I'm so high, dude.
I just rubbed amethyst all over him and kept saying 'no bites.'
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
Omphalophobia is a real thing. don't ever fucking touch my belly button again dude
You yelled "Shame!" like you were that bitch from Game of Thrones and then hit my balls full force with your sports bra
You were so drunk Last night you asked for your glasses so you could read the directions on a band aid
Randomize
