Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
some people wear their heart on their sleeve but you just wear your vagina on your face.
I am standing at the lion i publicly humped last night. i am mortified.
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
Come back. Shots need mouths.
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
Thought about it. I'm gonna go to work, but I'm gonna tell them I wrestled a bear saying I fell just isn't working.
Can my mom come with to the bar? Prince just died and I feel like I need to take her out to cheer her up.
Dude. Got a sore throat. Don't know if it's because my body is rejecting Michigan or cause of the bad ass blow job I gave last night
Tell him that his phone is taped to the dog's stomach. Stop trying to call it because it makes him scared.
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
Randomize
