yeah for some reason your penis didn't fit in my mouth the other day
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
My idea of sleeping together involves doing the Humpty Hump. Her idea of sleeping together focused more on being fully clothed on the opposite sides of a king sized bed.
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
woke up with ski boots on and a kayak in my room... birthday successful? i'd say so
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
I spent most of the stoned conversation with my dad proving to him that the Newfoundland is an actual dog and NOT a Snuffaluffagus-esque figment of my stoned imagination, while laughing over the fact there is actually a place caller Dildo, Canada. Have YOU taken time to be a good dad today?
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
Randomize
