so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
She called his dick the colossus. I dont give a fuck if shes his wingman, I gotta see this natural wonder
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
I would fuck him just for his dog
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