I'm not really sure how I got home, but judging by this headache, i'm assuming it involved bourbon.
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
just caught a 10 year old kid staring at my dick next to me in the urinal. i just nodded to him and said yeah, mines bigger little dude. i gotta stop drinking in public....
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
He was lasting forever and I couldn't take it so I faked an asthma attack
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
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