Non-Jews are for practice
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
This is the LAST time i'm accepting the excuse "tequila made me do it". Even tequila thinks buying all of nickelback's itunes singles is fucking retarded
on the brightside, the semester can only get better from getting a dui at 8 am on the first day.
your optimism is becoming unhealthy
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
Breaking up as roommates was a poor life decision. I'm sorry. Thank you for never shitting on the floor.
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
so I ate shit in the bar and took a barstool down with me and this guy helped me up and I just started making out with him. I need to stop meeting men like that
Napping in front of family members can be embarrassing when you get a christmas boner in your sleep
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
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