I'm at a job interview and I smoked a little before I came. I thought it would make me less nervous. Boy was I wrong.
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
Whats proper etiquette for apologizing to your wife for being so drunk you stood up and pissed on the bedroom floor next to the bed?
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
I just had sex with a man wearing a Darth Vader helmet....he pressed the voice button the whole time that said "I am your father". I don't think I can ever come back from this
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
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