She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
the boobs are fake... i feel like i just found out santa isn't real.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
How in the hell did I take a shot of whiskey to the eyeball last night?
Pretty sure I was rubbing Halloween candy all over my face and saying "these are my bitches."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I couldn't get past the raccoon on my porch so i slept on my lawn.
You called me at 3 am laughing like an idiot. Apparently you consider breaking out of the hospital to be a lifetime achievement.
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
You need to stop showing people the things i drunk-text to you... i have a reputation to uphold here
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
Im four hours late for work AND i pissed my bed
Randomize