So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
She dumped me and then asked if I wanted to come to her improv show. Fuck theatre majors, man.
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
You are a genius and a whore.
Randomize
