apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
I feel the need to send all my exes pictures of penises larger than theirs. Because they all must suffer.
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
I found him with a guitar and his kitten in his room. He was singing a song he'd titled "you're a cat". Guess what most of the lyrics were...
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
Not only did she fulfill a life long dream of mine of banging in a library, she bought me subway for lunch. I feel like I got the best gold star ever today.
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
There is eyeliner on my toilet. Vodka and I have a love hate relationship.
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