you said youd get me home safely, you dropped me off at 9:30 last night and i just woke up on my porch.
GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
My text messages all automatically add Zs on them cause of your skank ass messages you send me
I lined up everyone's pillows and I'm playing Evel Knievel when I jerk off later.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
I wanted to take a shower but I forgot we made applesauce in it last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
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