lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
I have a voicemail from Mike at 1am. He starts to say something, but then throws up instead.
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
you want your laptop back?
are you giving me my laptop back, or cashing in on our break up sex?
both.
come over.
He just texted me asking if I remember pinching his eyelid shut with my eyelash curler.
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
There are two things I love in this world. Dick and cats. Why can't I just have dick and cats forever
Best line overheard at the bar: "This is the last time I'm shaving my ass for him...I mean we just broke up".
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
Randomize
