none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
Nah the bridesmaids all had dates. I slept with the next best thing: girl who WANTED to be a bridesmaid but didnt make the cut.
Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
Okay, yeah, judgmental guy at 7/11. I'm buying g wine at 10:20 in the morning. You wanna fight about it?
we were all too drunk to realize that the cat wasnt yours
He said "I can't believe I had sex with a cat lady". Am I flattered or is this a new low?
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