On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
Manager just farted into the intercom. Whole place heard it. A number of people stopped everything and looked at him. Best. Night. Ever.
So I was throwing up in this fancy toilet at a party last night, when he decided it would be funny to flush it. It was a beday. I had to walk out with toilet water and regurgitated rumpleminze all over my face and shirt.
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
history professor just told us he has magic fingers. i'm going for it.
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
He was the only guy who ever made me cry..
Who, the park ranger who made you dump out your beer on the beach?
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
Randomize
