I just realized that my mother and I have the same favorite sex position, Guess which one!
OMG! Ew.
Lucky Dad.
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
I got tired of walking to the bathroom that I decided to throw up in a cup. I now have 3 cups full of vomit on top of my mini fridge
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
The great part about clubs is that you can fart everywhere and nobody knows! The bad part is I'm on e and i have nobody to fondle.
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
Randomize
