Did you REALLY have to twitter about our sex last night?
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
dude, im taking a shit and i just realized it's his MOM in the shower not him...oh fuck
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
I'm pretty sure the rest of my evening will consist of masturbating, drinking tequila and watching children's movies.
Like, when both of your dads are drag queens you're bound to have some amazing Halloween makeup
Oh man I missed being single! Two different guys just sent me dick pics during my kid’s little league game.
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
I told the cop I was late for a booty call. He still gave me a ticket but he wrote his number on it
Randomize
