foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
There's a dead squirrel in the freezer. Is that what you stopped to get out of the road last night?
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
It's less than a hour into 2020 and I already want to punch some people in the face
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
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