im gay
i know
yea but for you.
k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
Ugh he's texting me.
Tell him you're no longer interested in what he has to offer; his shitty personality outweighs his sexual prowess.
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
I feel like a pet sloth would complement my lifestyle.
You dropped my mother on the dance floor. She has a concussion. You didn't apologize. Don't speak to me for a while.
I'm trying to find a fanny pack so I can bring pizza on my run
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
I deserve this hangover.
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
Took my nervous poop earlier then expected it's gonna be a good day
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