So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
it really sends the message that i like to impregnate mortal women and have them birth fantastic half man-half god infants.
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
Technically, I traded a soft pretzel for sex last night...
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
Randomize
