they need to just BURY HIM!
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
You can't just hum the Jaws theme song when you pull down my pants.
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
Do you think the neighbors will know I was the one giving out the penis shaped lollipops to the children?
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
Lol okay. He's gonna show up with like a trunk of sex toys. He's like the mary poppins of hotel fucking.
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
You were wearing a sequin mini, with Tevas. And you still got laid.
With my son watching me, I pulled down my pants and shit in her trash can.
You talk the same way I hallucinate.
Took my nervous poop earlier then expected it's gonna be a good day
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
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