i think i should save myself the $200 for a prom dress. i mean why bother. its just going to be covered in vodka/jizz/and puke by the end of the night.
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
She made me walk a straight line to prove i was sober enough to help carry you to the car
Knowing you it was perfect out of spite. Like. A line straighter than YOU
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
Man, it's really obvious that I was either handcuffed or tied up last night. Either way, not something you'd want coworkers knowing.
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
like, there should be nothing wrong with me wanting to watch you put on a bikini and roll around in a kiddie pool of jello
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
Randomize
