before smithy murders me i need you to know 3 things. 1) i got with smithy's little sister last night. 2) i will always love you like my own brother. 3) smithy's little sis digs anal.
This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
Your brother just informed me that half a mouthful is a unit of measurement. I love talking to members of your family.
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
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