i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
I've been asked to reupholster their slam-couch so I found some off-cuts of medical-grade, hermetically sealed fabric. She'll be slammed upon for generations to come.
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
Randomize
