Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
Hello Stephanie, you need to come pick me up at Par Blvrd correctional facility and bring $750-$1000 for bail. I just got a DUI. Thank you.
What!?!?! How are you txting?!
Because this is Officer Reynolds, and I just arrested your boyfriend.
i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
he's singing something in russian and knocking over my plants with his dick, get his drunk ass out of my apartment
HE STUCK IT IN THE FISHBOWL WTF
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
Well that's very sweet of you. I have a strange feeling you're going to regret this when you sober up.
NO REGRETS FUCK DA POLICE
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