I can only masturbate in one position. It's very inconvenient.
please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
He could list all of the presidents! Every one, and in order!! I was so impressed the least I could do was give him a blow job.
Ah, yes. Making our founding fathers proud.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
Sometimes I get in situations where I realize they think I'm smarter than I am and then it's just one more thing I have to fake.
I'm about to be a big disappointment.
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
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