why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
that shirt you're wearing that says "officially single" makes me think you'll be that way for a really long fucking time.
You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
The doctor said 'youre the 2nd youngest person that ive seen with this condition. Thats probably not the silver medal you were looking for today.'
Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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