She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
Well at least he stopped keeping track of money by bottles of McCormick.
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
My New Years Resolution is to get everyone to start talking like a 40 year old douchebag. From now on, you will only refer to me as Chief.
Imma need a double jack on the rocks and a BJowsky from the hot bartender.
Yes I said BJOWSKY. Pronounced "buh jow skii".
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
The not so cute guy next to me made me play Kid Rock on the jukebox but I'm a big believer in free drinks so I obliged.
Oh god establish a safe word
I'm going to! Pineapple.
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
The last thing I remember was them slipping shots into my beer bong, and me being happy about it
Randomize
