I forgot how hot balto sounded
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
You poured your drink on him and called him a "useless cocksucker" because he wouldn't give you a ride home... on his skateboard
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
His new girl is probably classy and boring. I bet she doesn't feed him sour patch kids while she wiggles his weiner.
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
He was so wasted he lit his sink on fire with shit he found in his room....it was smokeless. Chemistry majors drunk = the coolest shit ever.
You made me take you back to Mcdonalds so you could yell at the guy for not giving you enough ketchup packets
I vaguely recall french fries...
You then proceeded to call your mom and tell her you weren't coming home because you were "tripping balls"
Sweet...
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