I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
How's work?
Spinning.
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
Is there any chance I can see you without pouring vodka on your head?
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when i get back.
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
I met a bunch of Germans and said in german "this is for the fatherland" and poured a beer on my head
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
Nothing says "I'm sorry for shitting in your bed" like an Olive Garden gift card
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