so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
Not cool at all. Last night I organized my condoms by expiration date. I need to get laid.
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
3 for 3 on getting girls who say "yolo" at the bar to have anal. Not the motto I live by, but it has changed my life.
Erry day erry day!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
At one point 12 people dressed in care bear onesies were up on stage grinding super nasty, and two of the girl Care Bears were making out.
If this wasn't a hallucination, we need to go to this magical kingdom every night of the week.
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
How many of my Tinder dates can my Christian roommate accidentally meet in the hallway at 3am before she's horrified and moves out?
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
Just a typical Friday. Dinner, drinks, doing lines with a member of Congress
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