I bet i've been more pregnant than you.
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
2 reasons we need to wear those onesies to the bar more ofter 1) comfy as shit 2) we both still got laid\n\nHow can you resist that kinda night?
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
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