Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
seriously who else gets carried home puking from a fucking mary kay party?
some people offered us free beer as long as we shotgunned it and after you shotgunned four without pausing they took their offer back
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude you need a shock collar for some of the things you say when you're drunk.
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
I accidentally walked in the wrong house but I somehow left with a chicken leg. Good fucking night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
either I'm really high or that last bong rip tasted like christmas
If I get one more "oh yaaaaa he changed your oil" texts, I'm gonna lose my shit
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
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