I hate all girls vehemently.
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
Brought 2 entire pizzas with to the bar, everyone loves us
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
Today needs to die. The mail delivery guy watched me throw up in my yard while taking my chihuahua out in Christmas pajamas at noon. Low point in my life.
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
So this morning when I woke up. I found my refrigerator open and no more food. It was empty, I'm home alone for the week. Where in hell did that food go?
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
Nothing ruins your day more than waking up to you dogs crotch in your face
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