how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
Its official, drinking for 15 hours counts as a suicide attempt
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
Pro: She likes to masturbate to 50 shades of grey. Con: She reads 50 Shades of grey non-ironically.
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
Dude, you ever snap awake on the toilet at work with that panicked, "How long have I been here?!" feeling??
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
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