I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
I woke up at 4am on the couch with half my clothes on. And by half my clothes I mean my earrings.
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
After the clumsiest day of my life I think it's safe to say my dream of being a ninja is dead. Memorial service with a glass of wine at 8pm
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
Randomize
