i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
bottle of wine in one hand cigar in the other. 5 am. topless on our fire escape. and she cleaned our bathroom... i like his new girlfriend.
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
You promised me a handle of vodka if I took home her ugly friend. Thanks to law class I took for the 2nd time I know that's a unilateral contract asshole
When you get to his house tomorrow, follow your instincts. Find the cat first.
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
Did you have ill-advised lesbian sex on the deathbed of their relationship?
Of course. Go big or go home.
You're my fucking queen.
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
The next time we go out, we're bringing a jar so that people can contribute to the rest of what I need to come up with for my breast implants... We'll show them yours for inspiration and persuasion.
How do u explain to your grandma that your relationship status is hooking up with randoms at a bar
and then after the older sorority girl asked me his name she said "he gave me the rest of his mcdonalds and I decided to go home with him. it was the best that I could hope for my night"
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
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