Tap Here to view the Mobile Optimized TFLN
That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
i soberly give you permission to do that to me when im drunk
they need to just BURY HIM!
Talking to this girl is like playing minesweeper on hard. There's red flags everywhere.
Santa Clause just drove by me on a fire truck. Epic night begins.
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
It's 5:30am in Vegas and I'm eating McDondalds next to crying prostitutes.....low point.
Cognac is not meant to be taken in shots. I just wanted you to know the desperation of last night.
Getting cock-blocked by Jeff Bridges. NOT OKAY.
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
Randomize
Follow @tfln