SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
You should probably wake up already as I have yet another story for you. Teaser? Blood from knife wound. Tequila. Guitar hero. Kitchen counter. Lawyer.
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for.
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
Im laying on the couch wishing someone was here to pour wine in my mouth. I need an alcohol IV
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
Randomize
