So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
Also, i'm pretty sure i've had my birth control pill stuck in my throat since like...two pm. So i'll be practicing safe oral sex tonight.
Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
I'm just saying, I walked in on you blowing a burrito. I now understand how obsessed you are with Taco Bell. And how long it's been since you've got some.
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
i know it looks like there's pee in the mayo jar in the fridge but i promise it's just apple juice that wouldn't fit in the jug after i added the booze.
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
Why is the toilet broken? Why did I wake up naked in the shower, hugging a bath mat? WHY IS THE TOILET BROKEN?
Is it just clogged or something?
No! There are actual chunks of toilet on the floor.
Randomize
