OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
Maybe STDs were invented to keep stupid people from having kids.
Well this lady at the bar told me I was a natural on the tambourine and that it was my God given talent. and then she gave me a tambourine.
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
I'm eating chocolate cake while this guy snaps me from the gym. Like I cant believe i actually considered getting rid of this cake. Have fun sweating ima eat this cake 👌
I wish there was a tumbleweed emoji. Because that would describe my vagina.
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
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