oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
Dear tim. Christina farted and it smells like kid roses.
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
a guy offered me a piece of pizza if I'd make out with a random girl. We got the whole damn box and I ain't even mad
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
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