I bought a boat. Want to have sex on The Angry Clam? That's what I named it.
this guy showed up at my house asking for his sword and cape. something tells me i shouldn't drink that much again.
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
took 4 advil with a shot of vodka, figure i'd try to save myself now
Just got a blowjob on the pier where my great-grandfather entered America.
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
Just put an ad on Craigslist for a fake groom... I'm sure only non creepy sane people will respond to it
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
Randomize
