it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
i woke up and the dog was eating spaghetti off my chest.
Remember the girl passed out in front of my fireplace?
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
Thank you for being so charming, but do you have syphilis?
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
Randomize
