thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
I did too many shots and now a kitten is trying to eat my bagel.
It's not really the holidays until I raid the medicine cabinet. Happy hydrocodone to me
And a merry methadone to all
Thanks to that wedding, I got to use the term "finger bang" more than I have since high school.
my vag sweat smells like doritos
so now that we're not dating you have to stop sending shit like this to me okay?
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
I tried sex in a car once. It was like trying to do yoga in a drainage pipe with your arms and legs tied while using a typewriter with your penis.
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
Randomize