I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
23 Roommates Share Secrets Their Roomie Thinks They Don’t Know
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
29 Cringeworthy Situations People Realized They Shouldn’t Be In
Apparently I'm not allowed to call at 3am anymore and ask to speak to all his siblings. I was just trying to get to know the family
We are planning a drunk snapchat treasure hunt for tomorrow, and the treasure is his penis, this is a game I'm not willing to loose.
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
I called my mom while I was blackout drunk, and told her I was drunk, safe, and happy. But really, I was just drunk.
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman