do you know how hard it is to sit through a 3 hour movie with someone and not fuck them?
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
My mom just called and reminded me not to throw up in any cabs tonight. Happy St. Patty's Day.
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
Who had my phone last night? Whoever it was sent "Fuck you, you're adopted" to half the people on my contact list.
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
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