we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
My favorite bra is missing and I smell like beer and bad decisions. This is definitely a sign that hoe mode is activated.
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
Left my house last night with a girlfriend, $200 in my wallet, and 10 finger nails. Came home with no girlfriend, an empty wallet, and 9 1/2 finger nails.
Yea, I had a bad night too aha
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
The REAL engagement ring is the jeweled butt plug.
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